I feel emptied, like I don’t have enough of what this life requires. What do you want, you big ol’ bully? I wake up this morning knowing I’ve got a food shopping to do, a big week to prepare for at school. I was absent on Thursday and Friday, so this is the day to make up for all that work missed. But as I stand in the bathroom, bobby-pinning the worst of my wispy bangs into place, I’m tired. I’m tired of trying to figure this out. I’m tired of not coming up with any answers. I’m tired of always being two steps behind a world that won’t slow down.
Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Because I want to do it on my own. Because I want to stay, but it feels like there’s no other option than to go. Because I want to do it on my own–
Why so disturbed within me?
–but this time, I can’t. I can’t do it on my own. I can’t make something out of nothing. I don’t know how to trust Him for this. I’m tired, God. Your little girl over here. I’m tired, and I’m poor. I’m poor. I’ve nothing with which to answer the world’s questions. So do something. Do something.
Put your hope in God,
For I will yet praise Him,
My Savior and my God.
a scribble of jo 